I was planning on catching up with some sleep but the person in the next room has their telly on VERY LOUDLY so I've decided to put fingers to keypad as I'm awake. And one of the reasons I'm so tired now is down to rather exhausting events last night.
Having ended yesterday's blog on quite a positive note I had my patience and positivity put to the test. I had been half drifting to sleep when I was told the nurses were going to get me up at around 11pm. So I was tired anyway, having been up since 5am. Though as Kev pointed out, I had had some sleep later that morning. Anyway the nurses turned up as promised and as I needed to wee they decided they get me out of bed and onto a commode. They told me how to manoeuvre to the edge of the bed but that was easier said than done. The mattress slopes up to the edge, there's lots of friction on the bedclothes and as I tried to move I had the most horrendous pain in my groin and incision area. I got to the edge of the bed but it bloody hurt. I sat there for a bit getting my breath back but didn't feel faint. They did ask but I genuinely didn't. I've done fainting enough and this wasn't it. I moved off the bed onto the frame then turned and went onto the commode and then it all changed.
I went really swimmy and shaky. I sat on the thing but was really struggling to focus. (I did manage a wee though!) I was aware of the nurses grabbing the oxygen for me and putting a mask on my face. I was aware of being held up as I was doing my deep breathing. Next thing they were moving me back on the bed, and I was feeling sick. At that point I was aware that there were several other people in the room but was past caring as I sat there dry heaving for a bit then being sick. I was so past caring that I wasn't even bothered about the simultaneous farting; my muscles have gone, clenching wasn't going to happen. I did apologise but really couldn't have cared less at that point. After being sick I did feel a bit better, and appreciated the breeze coming in. At 11pm. In February. In Cheadle.
My blood pressure had been low all day so no surprise it was low at this point. They also decided to run an ECG on me. Now what I didn't know at this point was who all the other people were who'd appeared in the room. I found out after it was a team who got paged if there was a possible problem and included an ICU doctor and nurse sister. Think I might have freaked out if I'd known. And amusingly the trigger to page them was my lack of response to the nurses questiins. A state of emergency because I'd stopped talking, couldn't make it up! Anyway apparently I showed a T3 wave inversion. Some heart thing I have no idea about. I was hearing them saying they might want blood tests for a cardiac enzyme called troponin. This did start sounding a bit more heavy but in the end they ran another ECG later and the doctor was satisfied it was ok. I had blood pressure checked again and drip reinstated, then was able to try for some sleep; it was about 1am after all!
I did sleep, I was properly woken at about 4. 30 for blood pressure checks, dosed off a bit after that until my next check about 2 hours later. At that point my blood pressure was even lower. They said once I'd got up, eaten something etc it should pick up but they did have a doctor checking over my notes, and also took bloods again.
I'd heard a lot of people say they lost their appetite after surgery. Not for me. The food here is ok and I'm bloody hungry. Anyway the blood pressure did creep up and I certainly felt a lot better. Which was good as I got my physio visit that morning.
Rebecca was great, no nonsense, there to get me working. She showed me a different way to get off the bed which was far easier. She'd also got me moving my leg a bit first before going in for the action. I got onto the frame and she helped me go to the bathroom. Peeing in a toilet instead of a bedpan was heaven! The actual walking was very tough as the muscles in the bad leg just feel so tight and resistant. It's not so much painful as uncomfortable, really heavy. You kind of know it all needs to loosen up but just wonder how. She helped me back to the bed, a little harder to get bad leg up, but managed it with a little help. I was knackered but well chuffed. She knew Kev was due later that day and said as long as I didn't feel bad, she was happy I could go to the bathroom with him in attendance, on the basis he could call for assistance if need be. I was also able to sit on the edge of the bed at my table to eat. If only I'd been able to do that with my porridge at breakfast. Hadn't thought that one through when I'd ordered it!
So Kev duly showed and helped me to and from the bathroom. And to get my leg onto the bed. Again tiring but very satisfying. After he left I was really sleepy (at 3.30, old lady or what!) But any hope of sleep was dashed when Rebecca showed up again and this time waved my crutches at me. She got me out on the frame then straight away put me onto the crutches. As before it felt tight but once we got going it felt great. She walked me down the corridor and back, and this time I got back onto the bed with no help. I am superwoman!! Then it got even better when she said she was fine with me managing on my own to go to the bathroom and sit off the bed for meals. To have got to that stage just about 15 hours after my fainting/vomiting/farting exploits was just amazing and I was buzzing. I didn't feel 100%, had a little headiness but decided I was back to me but just a druggy version! Gotta love this morphine :)
Then another milestone. I injected myself!. I have said before how the thought terrified me but I knew I had to do it. And being superwoman today, why not go for it. Having had the technicalities of the protected needle system explained, bringing back memories of the delightful Zoladex system I worked on, I was handed the syringe. Inserted in my now usefully flabby belly, no problem, no pain. Depressed plunger...shit, that stings. Was too careful and slow, next time quicker and get the pain over more quickly. And then bugger it all, I withdrew without depressing fully and enabling the shield to come down. From superwoman to sharps hazard in just a few seconds!
On top of that Mr Hoad-Reddick popped in to see me and hinted I could go home tomorrow. But that would be a pain as Kev is over his mum's and won't be here til late afternoon. To be honest I will feel a bit safer with one more day under my belt. But just to have got this far is brilliant. I am so proud of myself as I can get wound up too easily but with this I have just been feeling positive, feeling pretty calm and overall feeling good. In fact the only downer has been taking the lid off my pudding tonight to find my chocolate pudding had turned into rhubarb crumble! Disaster, hope they rectify that tomorrow.
Since then I've been winding down. I'm on top of painkillers but didn't help the cause when a rather inelegant return to the bed seemed to catch me a bit. I also feel a wee bit light headed but hopefully a bit more to drink and a decent sleep might help. The nurse has just appeared and said it's likely down to the morphine. And a mug of hot chocolate is on its way. Today has been a good day.
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